Why You Should Be Setting Intentions for Yourself

Intentions are the ideas in our head that provide purpose for our actions. Before we set out to do something, we usually create a reason for doing said activity. This can be as simple as setting an intention to get chicken at the grocery store so you can make cutlets for dinner. This example seems so simplistic that you may be asking yourself who really needs to think that deep into it. You’d be correct to think so because on the surface, setting intentions seems like a mindless activity. However, when applied to situations of depth, intention setting is much less mindless and is a great practice for mindful living.  

Specifically looking at new relationships (friendships, romantic, or otherwise), setting intentions is a vital first component that many of us overlook. When we first meet someone, naturally most of us like to take things slow and see where they head. It’s best practice to not force anything and just see where to flow goes. While doing this though, it’s a good idea to determine your intentions with this new person to avoid personal confusion and/or disappointment.

For example, if you meet a new person of interest that you feel could potentially be a romantic candidate, it would be beneficial to sit yourself down and decide what your intentions are. Are your intentions to get to know him and see where it heads, being okay if it lands on just friendship? Are your intentions to get to know him with the intention of dating if things go well and leaving out the option of just being friends? Are your intentions merely to have a casual, physical fling? Without overthinking it, it’s good to just give yourself a light idea of what you would be okay with having. 

Recognizing and setting up whatever intentions you have allows a clear mental path. When you are clear about what you want, it eliminates the dependency and uncertainty of waiting on the other party to decide. If you walk into a new partnership knowing full and well that you are hoping to create a pathway to a relationship, but the other party merely wants a friendship, then you already know from the kickoff that your current values aren’t aligning, and it is probably best to just move forward.

You should always know what you want for yourself and what you are expecting to get out of a situation before you dive into it. A large part of our self-worth is knowing what we will and what we will not accept and abiding by that. How can you know what kind of treatment you deserve from someone when you haven’t decided what you want the situation at hand to be? If you have solid, clear intentions for yourself then you will be able to set boundaries and operate within those walls of self-respect. If we’ve all learned anything, it is to not expect too much from people at first, as cynical sounding as it may be. When you have intentions of what you want, you remove the possibility of being let down by expectations. Before diving too deep into a new venture, think to yourself what outcome you’re okay with accepting and don’t force anything that does not align with your intentions.