The Hard Truth About Self-Care

We’ve all seen the Instagram posts and Tiktok videos of the social media dubbed “that girl”. The aesthetically pleasing girl who is focusing on her own growth and mental health. The girl that wakes up and downs a glass of lemon water before Pilates. The girl who reads the self-help books and has a two-hundred-dollar skincare routine each morning and night. While it is admirable to see the work and attention these women are putting into their growth and well-being, it is not the complete reality. There is a vital side to selfcare that is quite the antithesis to this internet persona.

While self-care can look a lot like taking care of your physical health and physique, the truly successful process runs much deeper. A successful self-care regimen can look a lot like hard discipline. It can look a lot like deprivation of things that do not fulfill us in the right ways. It can look a lot like telling yourself you need to choose and do better for your own mental health.

A woman on a genuine self-care, self-improvement journey tackles a lot of deep-rooted issues beyond skin blemishes and carrying a little excess weight. She battles lonely nights. She battles the urge to fall back into poor, unfulfilling habits such as meaningless hookups and fruitless endeavors that temporarily fill voids. She chooses the tough love to tell herself no and embrace being alone. Until she learns to love the solitude and becomes one with herself. Growth like that doesn’t happen without the battle and struggle. Growth is born out of the tough love moments. Those moments where you tell yourself “no” to the poor eating habits and sleeping in versus cooking a nutritious meal or waking up for that early morning workout. New habits are formed from new mindsets and patterns.

A well-rounded self-growth path balances both ends of the spectrum. It allows for that time to relish in an “aesthetically pleasing” version of self-care. It requires times where you look in the mirror, bare faced after a good skincare session or dolled up after your makeup routine and feel beautiful in your skin. However, it also requires looking oneself in the mirror after a crying session from facing the upsetting memories or embracing the uneasy emotions and still choosing to love yourself. Growth will stem from facing your demons and teaching yourself better, as well as taking those slow mornings to love and care for yourself extra.